left.

Lying with my back to the sheets I’m desperate to find the answers to the questions in my mind.
I haven’t got a home, I haven’t got a prayer,
left.
It’s a hard way to die, murdering your own hope.
My eyes wander these streets in fear – I’ve got everything to lose.
I don’t know how to feel this kind of love.

M.

 

Talking about our feelings.

Loneliness

It feels like a hand just holding your heart..
not grabbing it tightly, but just keeping a hold so that nothing else can get to it.
Never letting go, but never attempting to kill.
It feels like we lost ourselves somewhere,
and our lives have transformed into a never ending search for something better –
not having known we possessed the better all along.

In Love

I could never topple from this high,
this pedestal you’ve put me on.
I may have wings, but I will never use them.
I am fine sitting here, beside you, forming an us.
Fore if I could count the seconds in which I thought about
what it would be like to hold your hand just once,
to touch your cheek and feel you shiver,
to put my ear upon your chest and hear your heart
and wonder if it was beating for me –
if for some reason, all reason had left the picture,
and we just did it because we could,
then I would use all the seconds in my lifetime.
And I would regret not one, but none.

M.

IMG_0122

Mismanagement

I think of you as if no time has passed.

No leaves have fallen, nor snow,

since that day.

That moment my heart cracked into three pieces –

one for you

one for me

and one for the life that would never exist.

I hear it in every song.

I feel it in every breeze.

I taste it, like copper,

thrown into dusty corners and forgotten.

I wait for it,

every second.

Somehow you’ve managed to make me invisible to myself.

I look in the mirror and I don’t know what I see. Just shapes.

Lines.

Curves.

Hardened eyes.

Today I held a piece of the earth in my hands and poured myself to the ground in droplets.

They say your whole life flashes before your eyes when you die.

I hope you’re excluded.

M

Ownership

The light floods across your skin like it owns you.
Taking over your dark spaces like I never could.
Somewhere lurked a pattern that I didn’t find until it was too late..
The storm came in, thrashing all of our windows,
wetting our curtains
and extending its hands around our throats..
“You’re not exactly a great welcoming party,” it yelled.
Your hair fell out of place and struck your cheek.
You cracked a smile and I stared, wondering if I could love you.
If I should love you.
We’re always chasing something that we have no right to own.

M

 

charm(eleon)

I’m telling my story
and though it may change every time
it is mine.
There is love in here that belongs to someone.
Even on dark days I know this to be true.

When life turns upside down
and inside out
I stand willing.
Shoulders bare(ing)
the depths of many,
but the strength of one.

There’s no one that can heal me but me.

I’m telling my story
and though it may change every time
it is mine.

M.