could have been Anthony

my jaw clicks
it is the same click shared
by my uncles
and my dad
i often wondered
had i been born with-


out a purpose

had i been an Anthony
instead of what i am
would i be any different?
would i be
a parent
a poet
i have built engines
i have cut trees
i have fought wars (eternal)
i have kissed a girl
i have raised my voice
i have fallen in defeat
and i am just as lost as ever
my jaw clicks
but only when i’m trying to tell you
that it doesn’t matter


2 thoughts on “could have been Anthony

  1. I’ve found my self reading your last poem repeatedly. On some level I can relate. Being without puropse and asking, if I were someone else would a purpose be more clear. I found some clearity when I thought about “the purpose” a little deeper.
    What I conclude for my own peice of mind may not intregue you in the same way but it’s worth a thought none the less. Try thinking about life as if it has no purpose. Then live by the name you want to be and not by the expatiation of the name that’s given.

  2. Thank you for your response. I don’t know that I can think of life as not having a purpose, I think that’s what we all struggle to find every day.. the reason we exist. To add some humor to the mix, I don’t know what expectations are behind my name, as I was apparently named after a woman who played a mistress to JR on the old Dallas show. Ha!

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