Over(think)

I understand sacrifice.
I understand compassion.

The line “be true to yourself” haunts me every day.

I feel tormented by the absence of people in my life.
It is very easy for people to say, “Go out and make friends.”
It is not easy, today, to just go out and make a friend when everyone looks at each other with their judge-y eyes.
I do it too.
I’ve always considered myself to be a nice person, but I am also a chameleon. I am revealing my truths here, truths that no one really has a need to know.

I understand sacrifice.
I understand compassion.
I understand giving and receiving,
compromise.

I suddenly like heavy metal
I suddenly like Jeeps
I suddenly like color-blocking
and gold polka dots
and Essie nail polish.

I’m a chameleon.
You’re a chameleon.
We’re not risk takers.

Am I blind to the fact that working hard is hardly working for me?
Head down.
Mouth closed.
Keep moving.

Confused,
M.