could have been Anthony

my jaw clicks
it is the same click shared
by my uncles
and my dad
i often wondered
had i been born with-


out a purpose

had i been an Anthony
instead of what i am
would i be any different?
would i be
a parent
a poet
i have built engines
i have cut trees
i have fought wars (eternal)
i have kissed a girl
i have raised my voice
i have fallen in defeat
and i am just as lost as ever
my jaw clicks
but only when i’m trying to tell you
that it doesn’t matter


if you read it fast, it’s better

i found the draft
and caught the chill
between my fingers
time passes quicker than
street lights
20 seconds later
we all stop and watch the youngster
cross the road
holding our breath
hoping everyone’s obeying the rules
this road is long
and soggy, it’s the TLH in April
when you’re never quite sure
you got the clearance needed
and you pray to God or Moses
someone comes to get you if you’re more
than 8 hours on the road
i found the draft
and caught the chill
rolling up the window
ending the airstream
connecting me to the Mealy’s
and all the trees supporting my habit
of a cold deep breath.



meet me at my watery edges
cast your judgements aside
and find that you are free
there are no eyes on you
but mine
accept fate and all of its disclaimers
the distance between you and your desires
is a fleeting thought
amongst the rot of your doubt
cast your judgements aside
and breathe your deepest breath
the only thing holding you back
is you.


the good dark

I wonder how long it will take you
to forget what my face looks like –
what my hands feel like.
All the silly promises we made
took off in the take off.
My life will not be a bestseller
I will still be here
enjoying the good darkness
in light of all opinions
growing without your sun.
We planted trees of forgiveness
patting the earth beneath the branches
it might not take,
or it might take forever.